So, I’m not exactly the spokesperson for all things married, considering I’m a 25-year-old single woman. However, I CAN speak for the fact that the ideal marriage in my land of pretend and make believe (which will probably never happen) lies in a balance of having your significant other be the best and worst part of your life. Now, hear me out — what I’m trying to say is that they have to be thing that drives you crazy in the best way possible, but they also have to get on your nerves in a way that only they can do.
They have to be the one you think about when you’re daydreaming of all the things you have in your life that you’re grateful for, but they also need to be that person who frustrates you to your core in a strange and endearing way.
It’s all about a balance. Like, think of marriage like a pizza. If you have too much cheese and not enou — wait, what am I saying, THERE ARE NO BAD PARTS TO A PIZZA. Which is exactly why I’m still single; there’s nothing wrong with me and there’s nothing wrong with anyone else, but I can’t for the life of me picture having to share a large pizza with anyone.
Enough about me and my very single life. Here are the reasons why marriage is the best-worst thing ever.
1. Dinner is always made…but the fallout is always different.
2. There is no such thing as your side and her side. It’s her side. Period.
3. Breakfast in bed is always a romantic thing to do…until you actually do it.
4. You are stuck with the person who decides the perfect time for a selfie is in between contractions.
But…it’s kind of endearing.
5. You give him boudoir pictures, and he gives you brodoir pictures in return.
It’s like a car accident: you don’t want to look at it, but you can’t help it.